My parents came home last night. They called me from the car they took back from the airport. I can’t even fathom their pain. All the planning, shopping, cleaning, hoping they did for this year’s Thanksgiving visit must feel like a cruel dirty trick now. How naive and innocent they were. We all were. We never dreamed that someone we loved so much could do something so final and terrible to us.
Now that this has happened it has made me want to reach out to a lot of people that I haven’t spoken to in a long time. I’ve really lost touch with all of my girlfriends from High School and College. The various reasons why seem so insignificant now. My brother and I really used to think of our friends as part of our family. Our own little family could be so maddening sometimes. Even though there were four of us, it often felt like the loneliest place. I hope that wherever he is now that he is free from that particular pain. Loneliness always felt like being stuck in the very smallest room with an even smaller door.